Let Yourself Be

No matter how hard you’ll try to change who you really are, your nature will always win. Don’t try to go against your nature, just let your true self be.


Annoying Things I Heard During And After Weight Loss

If you’ve recently lost weight or you’re currently losing weight, you’ll know what I am talking about. But if you’re at the start of your weight loss journey, this post will prepare you for some irritating comments you might hear.

During weight loss:
1) Is this really how you’ll lose weight?
Well this one is said in a sarcastic uncertain way. They just won’t believe, or more like accept, that losing weight only requires changing your eating habits and exercising.
2) A bite of this will not hurt!
Although it might not exactly hurt, but a bite can unconsciously lead to other bites. Also, a bite from this and a bite from that are added calories.
3) Are you really gonna eat that? Or Are you supposed to be eating this?
I am trying not to swear here, but did someone give them a diet police badge?? No one has the right to ask you what you’re about to eat or why you chose to, especially when you’re the one who’s been eating healthy. If you decided to have a cheesecake, then do it! It’s not like you’re ‘dieting’ or depriving yourself from food. You’re eating healthy, but it’s okay to have your favorite dessert every once in a while.
4) Don’t you think you’re overdoing this?
This has been said in response to “I don’t eat processed sugar”. I am not “overdoing” anything, because simply it’s not something that is being done, it’s a lifestyle. I chose not to incorporate processed sugar in my diet just like you chose to overload your body with high fructose corn syrup, but do you see me complaining? Beside that there is something called fructose in fruits that I can eat to get the sugar I need.
5) How much are you planning to lose?
This is annoying when my answer is followed by “don’t you think it’s a lot? I mean you don’t wanna end up looking like a skeleton, right?”. I seriously have nothing to say but “It’s my body and I know how much I should lose and when I should stop.” This has been said to everyone who asked me that freaking question.
6) I can’t lose weight no matter how hard I try *followed by more whining*
Listen, there are two scenarios here: 1) you have a problem in your body, something to do with your metabolism or thyroid for example. 2) you have a perfectly normal body but you don’t have the will to do it. Either way it’s not my problem. You can visit a doctor or a nutritionist if you’re case 1, or find the motivation you need if you’re case 2. I don’t have to sit and listen to your pessimistic view on weight loss, because I am working my a** off here trying to accomplish something. If you want my advice I’ll be more than glad to help, but if you’re here just to dispirit me then goodbye.

After weight loss:
1) So, are you going to start eating normal again?
I don’t even…never mind! Seriously? It. Is. A. Lifestyle. I am not ‘dieting’ for God’s sake! I AM NOT DIETING!! There’s no going back. Unless of course I want to gain the weight back!
Please tell me you’re not planning to lose more!
Please shut up!
3) You look good now, don’t lose more.
I am not sure whether this means I actually look good, or it means ‘we don’t want you to lose more because you make us feel fat’. I’ve been told this when I lost 5 kgs, when I lost 10 kgs, and when I lost 15 kgs. So I am not sure they’re being honest with me. I am a girl, and I know how girls are. It’s very common when a woman or a girl loses weight her peers will start telling her to not lose more.
4) Oh my God! You shrank!!
I’ve been told by one of my friends “you didn’t lose weight, you look like you were sucked in!” This was supposed to be a joke. Ba dum tsh! The reason why I look a lot smaller now is because I have a naturally small body frame, not because I’ve lost too much weight. In fact, I still need to lose 8 kgs to reach my goal.
5) Are you ill?
This one really takes the cake! Some people, who haven’t seen me in a while, actually asked me if I was sick. I don’t get. I mean people are supposed to look better after losing weight. People think I look pale now, but it’s because my skin cleared after I started to eat healthy and my facial features became more apparent. It’s not my problem I have a naturally very white skin. Blame my genes!

So, have you heard any comments about your weight loss that annoyed you? If so, please share it with us.

This Isn’t ‘Spot The Difference’ Game!

The primary reason why I’m writing this post is to stop myself, if I got tempted, from doing this destructive habit. I am talking about constantly comparing your life to other people’s lives. I’m gonna discuss why I used to do it, how it affected me, and how I learned to stop.

I think it started in my teens. At this age you are expected to figure out what you wanna do in your life and design a plan for your future. Of course I was clueless, I still am. In high school everyone around me was studying hard trying to maintain excellent grades to get accepted in prestigious universities. They seemed to have everything already figured out for them. I felt lost, and a little jealous of them. It continued after high school graduation and throughout college.

The problem with this habit is that it doesn’t encourage you change or do something about your situation, you just inactively watch everyone around you living their lives. You pity yourself, and ask ‘Why me?’. You keep wondering why everyone around are doing something in their lives and you’re just not accomplishing anything. It’s not envy really, it’s more like running away from your responsibilities by keeping busy of what others are doing and whining about how you’re not like them. It’s passive and self-destructive. I noticed that I do it whenever I feel like I am not going anywhere with life.

In my senior year of college I started to break that habit because I realized that everyone wants different things in life, and of course are gonna take different routes to get it. So why should I compare myself to others? Instead, I started to compare myself with the person I was before. It worked, and it was incredible and allowed me to change for the better. But when graduation came things started to fall apart. It’s time when you enter the real world, start looking for a job, be financially independent, sort out your life, and other adult’s stuff you need to take care of. It was scary and confusing. I couldn’t get a decent job, in fact I am still unemployed. The only thing I got was a part-time office job. Seeing my college mates working, or taking courses, or whatever they’re doing made me feel like a failure.

Recently I’ve met with my college friends for lunch and they told me their stories of post-graduation and how their lives are like right now. As they talked I realized that this is not what I wanted. Their lives that I saw as glamorous were suddenly unattractive for me. And that’s when I told myself that enough was enough. I promised myself not to compare my life with anyone else’s again, no matter what happens. Maybe the fact that I don’t have things figured out is a good thing. Maybe this will give me time to explore, to know myself better, to learn more about life, and to do things that others won’t normally think of doing.

Life is a journey. Everyone takes a different path with different means of conveyance. Some people would drive at 60 mph trying to reach somewhere as fast as they can, and others might drive slowly to watch the scenery around them and enjoy every moment on the road. Whatever your purpose in life is or how you want to do it, always remember that the only person you should compare yourself with is you.